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Survival of the fittest

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by Hefner, Oct 3, 2010.

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  1. Hefner

    Hefner Banned

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    Whenever I get a package of plain M&Ms, I make it my duty to continue the strength and robustness of the candy as a species. To this end, I hold M&M duels.

    Taking two candies between my thumb and forefinger, I apply pressure, squeezing them together until one of them cracks and splinters. That is the "loser," and I eat the inferior one immediately. The winner gets to go another round.

    I have found that, in general, the brown and red M&Ms are tougher, and the newer blue ones are genetically inferior. I have hypothesized that the blue M&Ms as a race cannot survive long in the intense theater of competition that is the modern candy and snack-food world.

    Occasionally I will get a mutation, a candy that is misshapen, or pointier, or flatter than the rest. Almost invariably this proves to be a weakness, but on very rare occasions it gives the candy extra strength. In this way, the species continues to adapt to its environment.

    When I reach the end of the pack, I am left with one M&M, the strongest of the herd. Since it would make no sense to eat this one as well, I pack it neatly in an envelope and send it to M&M Mars, A Division of Mars, Inc., Hackettstown, NJ 17840-1503 U.S.A., along with a 3x5 card reading, "Please use this M&M for breeding purposes."

    This week they wrote back to thank me, and sent me a coupon for a free 1/2 pound bag of plain M&Ms. I consider this "grant money." I have set aside the weekend for a grand tournament. From a field of hundreds, we will discover the True Champion.

    There can be only one.
     
  2. beastxrambo

    beastxrambo Expert

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    you are really weird dude.... o.o
     
  3. Spalonk

    Spalonk Proficient

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    lol awsm stuff xD
     
  4. hinigashi

    hinigashi Proficient

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    Please Thank the Creator

    http://www.craigslist.org/about/best/tpa/409930561.html

    Funny stuff ^^
     
  5. Thorfinn

    Thorfinn Proficient

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    hmm i dno about duels, but i remember when i was a kid i ate the colours one by one instead of random, i have no idea why you would do such things as an adult, boredom? or just crazy? o,o
     
  6. TooKrazy

    TooKrazy Legendary Member

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    wtf LOL i want some free M&Ms. havent had any in a while
     
  7. FuRiouS

    FuRiouS Legendary Member

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    I totally agree with you, but this is a kewl story brah :D.
     
  8. WhiteRaven

    WhiteRaven Proficient

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    lol

    WHY xD

    I cannot find the connection between sweets and GamezAion but that just made it funnier.
     
  9. Dementa

    Dementa Providence Forum Legend

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    General discussion isn't aion related :)

    Anyway, very interesting tale you have here >.>
     
  10. Fynie

    Fynie Ayyyyeeeeeeeee Forum Legend

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    you sir have to much time on your hands xD. Now share em with me :whistling:
     
  11. WhiteRaven

    WhiteRaven Proficient

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    Oh :pouty:

    Then i correct myself: it was a totally unexpected and random post. Random things that come out of the blue always make me lol. I wish there were more forum posts like this. :biggrin:
     
  12. BetaMax

    BetaMax Lord Emperor Forum Legend

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    Melts on your Hand? not in your Mouth? xD
     
  13. Siriath

    Siriath Proficient

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    I wants some M&M's and yah thats fun haha
     
  14. Warrriorzzz

    Warrriorzzz AuditionDanceBattle4ever Forum Legend

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    melts in his nose not on his feet? xD
     
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