Hell's Merry-Go-Round

Ayeeeooo <3
so yeahh.. you may see me QQing on forums right now, but i dont want anyone thinking of me as an attention whore or anything cause im actually in the state of Depression right now
My life has already been tortured enough by my family, my friend has ditched me and hasnt even been a month yet and just then, mum and i were talking about our family, and she dare say that when i was born, i was one ugly baby and that i wasnt loved enough. My cousin even told me that i was the 'Demon Child' after i turned into a toddler. (My cousin was nice enough to tell me the truth x3) That really offended me and has just literally tore me up because, SHES MY MOTHER, AND SHE JUST SAID SOMETHING I NEVER WOULDVE BELIEVED.

Dont call my over dramatic or anything, this is the truth, this is reality, this is MY life

@Anybody who are being dkheads: You are obviously not in the situation im in right now. So please .. just .. dont.

'Can nobody understand me? Can nobody relate to me? Was there something i missed?'

im sorry guys, i really need a big timeout on this one, no i am not killing myself and i dont plan on doing that LOL, but ...

Seriously, can life get any worse than it is now? If thats not enough, may i ask,
What on earth do you want me to do?

Continue being your little rag doll?

Im sorry but i never thought life was a joke.

Edit: One more little paragraph couldnt hurt could it ? :>
I wont ever cry, i wont ever regret, i wont ever trust her, i wont ever apologise, i wont ever feel sorry for myself, i wont ever bother with them and i wont ever be used.

 

i feel so sorry for you alot of things would'v changed if you are 18+ years old o_e

 

Maybe they couldve, but im not going to even bother with their existence until THEY say sorry to ME.

 

aww thats so sad idk what to say...

 

i always enjoy eating ice cream when im depressed

 

Regii it's hard to grow up in such a family...but atm u have to cope with it, with time passing u'll grow up and learn to let it go , u'll learn that it aint worth to "get stuck" in this . And the most important thing u'll learn is that you will be someone else and behave different with your family and kid/kids.
You will have ur own life and you will be the ONLY ONE to decide what is wrong and what is right for you.
Our parents (either good or bad) make a start line for us , depends on us to take the right path and live as we wish.
Just try to be strong till you can pick your own way in life.
<333

we will be here for you whenever u need =)

And sweetie , don't wait for them to apologize , it takes a lot of courage to do it , and if they are how u described them...they will never do it. You don't need their apologize , it's worthless.

 

regii whenever you want <3333
ill be a great mom, sis , friend for you
u so cute :*

 

i am understand what u feel right now, believe it or not, i am born in that such kind of family too... freak mother, who always hate me, hit me like a dog, and a lot of worst words that she said to me.. for 21 years i live with her, many times got depressed, never end grudge, a crazy think to kill my self..

And now here i am, i go from my house and my "freak mother". i am working, get my own money, meet someone who love me with my "dark background" family. I am still survived until now.

just Let it flow...:smile: if i can survive, sure u can do it too :smile:

i know it isn't easy, but Don't give up ok ^^

 

The life is either short because it's shitty ... or it's shitty because it's short ~

Adapt to the circumstances & try to overtake the problems , this is what I'm doing & it's still not clear whether I have a future or not ..

 

Awww, and you've been listening to me this whole while. I'm here if you wanna talk. And life's just preparing you, I've realized that also. Bad stuff happens for a reason, even if its not a real consolation. And yeah, once you're 18, move out of there like hell. I'm only staying with my parents right now cause they have tons of money lol. I have to do a bunch of shit to get to my trust money qq

 

see regii , we are ur family , we love you just as you are <33333
you can always count on us ^^

 

I don't know what kind of problem did you have with your parents, however look at the bigger picture, the fact that your parents loved you till now is proven on how they accomodated your living expenses and how they paid for the internets for your entertainment purposes, perhaps your parents is one of those people that doesn't think before they speaks, which inevitably allows them to speak those kind of words.

However, by having a talk with them may lead to a solution within this dispute, my case with my parents are similar to yours, our relationship wasn't a cordial one, however there's no such parents that doesn't love their child as they do love theirselves (or else they would either abort you or thrown you away).

I hope my advice could change your perspectives, which may dissipates your anxiety.

 

u have a future and ur future is with me.
NO doubts about it.

 

u are not a demon child not even a toddler, so tell ur cousin to shut the hell up.It's really sad to hear that, but u need to stand strong and u should believe that one day everything will be alright. and also remember that we are here <3 :3

 

Like I was telling you, it COULD be much worse. I've worked in the inner city of Chicago, and I was telling you about my friend Melvin, well I know plenty of other people. Forced into gangs by their parents. Abused as children so they have to turn to drugs. People kicked out of their homes at the age of 8. You have friction between your parents, and they may tell you they are disappointed in you, but trust me, you are not HATED by them. You don't get beaten or anything, which is a good thing. And you can't let it get you down, some people do, and once again, like I was telling you about Melvin, it ruins their lives. I mean, he was flipping playing for the BULLS, a pro basketball team. And cause of unresolved parental issues, he's now a security guard. It just goes to show, don't make it into an obstacle for yourself.

 

oh sorry then, i thought she was harm for u as well anyway regi! dont get broken inside, and just think of future, that might help

 

D: I didn't realize. Child protection services are always an option I guess? If you are really fed up with it. Thats horrible, you need to get out of there as quickly as possible.

 

yeah, i really dont need any of this sh't right now ecc, maybe in the future but not now <3

 

Ecchii , she really needs us , dont be a meanie >.<

 

Beaten until there's a ****ing scars? call the child protection agency and get your mother to a psychiatrist or something, my guesses are that her attitude is mainly derived from psychological issues, do it as soon as possible or it will get even worse from now on.